Breakfast on Pluto

"Well, fuck me pink with a hairy arse!"

A boy is born in conservative 1940s Ireland to a Priest (Liam Neeson) and an unknown woman who flees to London after the birth. Bought up by a strict Catholic foster mother he shows signs of difference at an early age when he is caught in a dress and heels. By the 1970s the teenage Patrick ‘Kitten’ Braden (Cillian Murphy) is a proud and open cross dresser, still living in the small, conservative Irish town. As he gets older he wonders about his mother and discovers that she fled to England. He decides to try to find her and along the way joins a glam rock band, has brushes with the IRA, turns to prostitution and comes close to death on a number of occasions.

The entire film is set against the backdrop of the ‘troubles’ in Ireland during the 1970s. Kitten comes face to face with both sides of the war on a number of occasions and the conflict forms a major stand throughout the story. Another stand is her struggle to fit in with a world that tends to reject her choice of lifestyle and her difficulty with everyone taking life so seriously. The film is cut up into thirty or so chapters. Each is numbered and titled but the plot flows smoothly throughout. This mostly worked well to set up a scene but did become a little tiresome after a while.

The Five Year Engagement

"You ate the old doughnut"

Tom (Jason Segel) is a sous chef at a top end San Francisco restaurant but is forced to move to the mid west when his fiancée Violet (Emily Blunt) gets a post graduate position at the University of Michigan. This occurs shortly after the couple’s engagement and they decide to put their wedding on hold for a couple of years until they return to the West Coast. Their relationship is strained though when Tom fails to fit in or find a satisfying job while Violet’s career takes off and leaves Tom alone to ponder the career he left in San Francisco.

As soon as the film opens you are able to chart its plot pretty much to a tee but the journey to the finale is both funny and intelligent. The film is helped in no small way by two delightful characters played by two very watchable actors, Blunt and Segel. They appear to have great chemistry and Blunt in particular comes out of her shell and puts her comedic chops to great use.

Friends with Kids

Six New York thirty-somethings see their lives change over the course of several years as children come into their lives. Alex and Leslie (Chris O’Dowd and Maya Rudolph) are a married couple with two children, struggling to keep their heads above water. Ben and Missy (Jon Hamm and Kristen Wiig) are a sexually charged couple who find things difficult once a baby arrives while Jason and Julie (Adam Scott and Jennifer Westfeldt) are best friends who know each other inside out. Fearing that they are getting old and seeing how difficult managing a marriage and child can be, they decide to have a child as friends with no emotional attachment. Both are free to carry on with their separate love lives after the child’s birth and agree to joint custody of the baby.

There have been comparisons to last years smash hit Bridesmaids but that is purely down to casting. This is a completely different film. While Wiig, O’Dowd, Rudolph and Hamm all starred in Wiig’s massively successful comedy, Friends with Kids reminded me more of a Woody Allen film, only without the wit or humour.

A Woman

Charlie Chaplin’s ninth Essanay film is perhaps one of his most controversial. A Gentleman (Chaplin) is out walking through a park when he comes across a family (Charles Inslee, Marta Golden & Edna Purviance). The father, Inslee has his attention drawn towards a flirt (Margie Reiger). Reiger blindfolds Inslee after suggesting a game of hide and seek. Chaplin meanwhile discovers the blinded man and leads him towards a lake where he pushes him in. Later Chaplin comes across Golden and Purviance who fall for the cheeky chappy and invite him home. When Inslee arrives home soaking wet to find his attacker in the house Chaplin resorts to disguising himself in an unorthodox manner.

This film is most famous for Chaplin’s cross-dressing, something that must have been quite brave and scandalous 97 years ago. For a twenty-first century audience it isn’t particularly shocking or even funny so you have to imagine a late Edwardian audience’s reaction in order to understand its significance.

Killer Joe

"Who's dick is it?"

A young man, Chris (Emile Hirsch) in debt to a drug dealer and his father Ansel (Thomas Haden Church) decide to hire a contract killer known as Killer Joe (Matthew McConaughey) to kill Chris’ mother in order to claim $50,000 life insurance money. Unable to pay upfront, Joe suggests taking Chris’ innocent young sister Dottie (Juno Temple) as a retainer, something that doesn’t sit easily with Chris.

This is a darkly comic and extremely violent film which is likely to repulse some and delight others. There were several walk outs in the packed screening I was in and many audible gasps as well as perhaps the biggest laugh I’ve ever heard in a cinema. For an example of how it will polarize people I turned to my girlfriend on the way out and said “what did you think?” She replied “I hated it. It was awful. One star”. I on the other hand thought it was excellent.

Bronson

"You don't want to be trapped inside with me sunshine. Inside, I'm somebody nobody wants to fuck with do you understand? I am Charlie Bronson, I am Britain's most violent prisoner."

Bronson is a biopic of Charles Bronson, real name Michael Peterson, Britain’s most famous prisoner. After being sent down for seven years in 1974 for armed robbery, Bronson got a name for himself by attacking guards, prisoners and holding hostages. This film starts Tom Hardy in the title role and takes place mostly during his incarcerated life (38 years and counting) but also briefly touches on his childhood and a brief stint of freedom. The narrative uses both a traditional plot account and a sort of talking head from Bronson in which he comments on various parts of his life from the present. There are also some quite superb and eccentric scenes in which Bronson is on stage, performing to an audience.

I’d seen this film upon its release in 2008 and had bought the blu-ray in about 2010 but hadn’t watched it again until last night when we had some friends visiting. I remember being blown away by the violence and Tom Hardy’s performances back in 2008 but don’t remember laughing so much. This film is funnier than the majority of mainstream Hollywood comedies.

Work

Izzy Wake (Charles Inslee) a paperhanger and his assistant (Charlie Chaplin) slowly make their way to the house of Billy Armstrong and Marta Golden where they are due to hang wall paper. After experiencing difficulty even getting to the house, once they get there things go from bad to worse.

This film made me laugh, a lot, but overall it was messy – much like the on screen action. I didn’t really get any sense of who any of the characters were and to be honest apart from inhabiting the house at the centre of the story, Billy Armstrong and Marta Golden’s characters weren’t really necessary. They and Leo White were only really used during the films frenetic ending which is somewhere between a chase and a farce. That being said, there is still much to like about this Chaplin Essanay effort.

Beetlejuice

"Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice"

A young couple (Alec Baldwin and Geena Davis) are driving back from town one day when they crash their car and die. It takes them a while to realise though as they end up back in their house but with a new family, father (Jeffrey Jones), Step-mum (Catherine O’Hara) and Goth Daughter (Winona Ryder) moving in. As they become aware of their death they try to haunt the family in order to get them to leave but despite turning to the ‘Handbook for the Recently Deceased’ for help, they are unable to be seen. Instead they turn to a bio-exorcist called Betelgeuse, a crazed, perverted and unstable dead man who agrees to help scare the family off.

Unbelievably I’d never seen this film before having confused it in my head with Candyman, a film I saw aged about seven which caused nightmares for months. I’m so glad I’ve finally watched this bizarre comedy/horror. The film contains everything that the best Tim Burton films do; odd characters and locations, unusual and distinctive sets and darkly comic plotlines.

Red Lights

"How did you know that?"

"I'm psychic"

Psychologist and paranormal investigator Dr. Margaret Matheson (Sigourney Weaver) and her assistant Dr. Tom Buckley (Cillian Murphy) a physicist travel around debunking supposed paranormal activity from bumps in the night to stage psychics. Dr. Buckley wants to investigate their most challenging person to date, Simon Silver (Robert De Niro), a redound psychic who is making a comeback after a thirty year absence from the stage. Dr. Matheson warns Buckley against this though after having come up against him in the 1970s and failing to prove him a fraud. With the help of student Sally Owen (Elisabeth Olsen) Buckley defies Matheson and begins investigating the illusive Silver.

As a radical atheist and sceptic the film’s ideas appealed to me. I was delighted to watch the scientists make fun of and debunk people who claim to see ghosts and be able to read minds. The script treats these people with distain and isn’t afraid to mention how these people can be responsible for giving stupid people false hope and can even cost lives. The cast is also amongst the best of any film this year. With actors such as Signourney Weaver, Cillian Murphy, Toby Jones, Joely Richardson, the delightful Elizabeth Olsen and my all time favourite actor Robert De Niro, anything less than a great film would be a disappointment. Well, this isn’t a great film but it isn’t terrible either.

Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter

"However history remembers me before I was a President, it shall only remember a fraction of the truth..."

In 1818 a young boy by the name of Abraham Lincoln (Benjamin Walker) witnesses his mother’s murder and vows to get revenge on the man who took her life. In his late teens he finally plucks up the courage to enact his revenge but when he fires a pistol at the head of the assassin, the man simply gets back up and attacks the young Lincoln. The young man is saved by a strange man called Henry Sturgess (Dominic Cooper) who tells the future President about the existence of vampires and teaches him the art of killing them. Lincoln dedicates his life to the destruction of vampires but finds in later life that words and deeds outweigh the power of his axe and he eventually becomes a Lawyer and later President of the Union. During his Presidency the vampire rich South declares war on the North in the hope of creating a nation for vampires.

This film is a case of a title that is better than the movie. The idea behind it sounds great; that one of America’s most beloved Presidents was also secretly a Vampire Hunter, but the execution doesn’t live up to the premise. I’ve recently read books about the American Civil War and Lincoln’s assassination so probably know more than the average Brit about the President and this period of America’s history and there were nice details, incidents and characters taken from the period and Lincoln’s life that were included to give a bit of authenticity to the story. The truth, with the added inclusion of vampires could have created a really good film but alas it is not.